Earlier this week I
brought you a glimpse into the timeline of events that lead to NFL player
Richie Incognito’s fall from grace including digital imprints in voicemails and
texts, as well as excessive tweeting, that added fuel to the story and left a
lasting public opinion of the player as the worst kind of bully.
My guest interviewee, national columnist Gregg Doyel, writes for
CBSSports.com and shines a light on the
struggles with reputation in the information age.
This week he wrote a piece on Incognito and
his battle with seeing the worse of himself in the public spotlight and whether
he could learn something from all his mistakes (http://cbsprt.co/1c7PudP). I was curious to get Doyel’s take on this,
especially regarding our own unique relationship.
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| Doyel on CNN 2009 |
Before this week I’d have been more likely to call Doyel an enemy than
a friend. In 2009, at the height of my
tabloid explosion, CNN covered dangers in the workplace
and whether the sports world plays by a different set of
standards, with
Doyel as their expert guest. Instead
of using his time on air to talk about workplace dynamics, Doyel spent most of
it degrading my appearance and sounding off on the fact I was only news because
I was so unattractive. And just like
much of my struggle in regaining control of my online reputation (lawsuits,
press circuits, websites), the video of Doyel remains heavily YouTubed to
my name. This week Doyel made a
conscious decision to right his wrong, using social media to reach out to me and apologize for his behavior
and embarrassment at the man he once was. I wanted to get inside his head both in his professional setting detailing
Incognito's story and in his personal life looking back at his public
mishaps. I wondered what brings about this negative behavior, is there something to learn
when we’re faced with the worst of ourselves, and is there a way to leave
behind a positive image in this crazy digital jungle?
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| Source: http://bit.ly/1nsPIXw |
Q.) What
do you think propels those in the sports world to take a more abrasive, "bullying" tone in dealing with one another?
A.) "I think it's personal weakness. We all want to be
perceived by our peers -- strangers, sadly -- as being cool or snarky or smart
or whatever, and so we tee off when we can. Sometimes it translates to
bullying, sometimes to cruelty or insensitivity. I suppose in some cases, sure,
it's a person acting out based on how they've been treated, and now it's THEIR
chance to treat someone badly. But in more cases, I'd bet it is just people
showing how weak and pathetic they (we) are by wanting to be perceived as cool
by a flock of strangers who don't care about us in the first place. Talk about
pointless."
Q.) How
do you think the digital age has changed how we view sports
professionals? Has it hurt more than helped? Has it changed how you
report?
A.) "Social media can show us the beauty in the world by
allowing us to share and spread links about wonderful stories, but it also has
made everything uglier because it has allowed us to see the real people we
cover and watch, and also it has allowed us to show the real US who are
covering and/or watching sports. Every person is flawed and imperfect, and
social media doesn't just take off our makeup and toupee, it aims a magnifying
glass on our blemishes. The irony is, we're the ones aiming the magnifying
glass at ourselves by trumpeting just how flawed we are as people. "
Social media has, finally, made me become a nicer
reporter/writer. I'm no longer chasing the snark crowd. If I have a snarky
thought and the readers like it, great. But also, I know they're going to like
prettier, more uplifting stories, and those are the ones I make it a point to
pursue. If too much time passes since I've written one of those, I make it a
point to write another one. Social media has helped me see the necessity of
that. People crave good news. And I crave it myself.
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| Source: http://bit.ly/1hmPbic |
Q.)
Looking at the long term effects of the digital imprint of ourselves that's available
24/7, how do you think Incognito's story will play out?
A.) Incognito isn't smart enough or nice enough to win on
social media, so he needs to get off Twitter. Some people don't have the tools
to win people over, and unless he changes who he is, he doesn't have those
tools. He's bound to screw himself up by saying the wrong thing; meaning,
showing us exactly who he is. And who he is, up to now, is a dislikable jerk
(at best). My advice to him would be to stop being mean and try to be nice.
Easier said than done, and you have to have that wiring within to embrace
kindness. Not sure he does.
Q.) Do you think there can be successes
in sports with social media? Is there a way to balance connecting with fans and showing a fun loving side, but not destroying one’s
professional reputation?
A.) There are some athletes who I'm
pretty sure aren't the nicest people ever, but because they're so good on
social media, they win anyway. Brandon Phillips of the Reds is one. Chad
Johnson (was) another. Some people are just so good at social media, even if
they're not terribly good at winning people over on the field or in the
clubhouse that it works for them. But those are the outliers, the exceptions.
They do exist! But it's really hard to appear nicer on social media than you do
away from it. Those two have done it, and kudos to them. They've shown me
another side of them, and made me reconsider them as people because they are so
charismatic and kind on social media.
